Trip Atan Erkeğe Nasıl Davranmalı?
Erkekler genellikle ikili ilişkilerde trip atmıyormuş gibi gözükse de aslında kendilerini rahatlıkla gizleyebildiklerini söylemeden geçemeyeceğiz. Kadınlar bu konuda daha fazla göz önünde oldukları için genellikle ilişkilerde trip atanları yalnızca kadınlar olarak biliriz. Ama gerçek tam olarak böyle mi?
Trip Atan Erkeğe Nasıl Davranmalı?
Yukarıda da bahsetmiş olduğumuz gibi, trip konusunda daima kadınlar ön planda olsa da, erkeklerin de bu konuda aşağı kalır yanı yoktur. Hatta bize sorarsanız erkeklerin attığı trip biraz daha gerçekçidir. 🙂
Kadınlar trip atma konusunda daha flörtöz olabiliyorken, erkekler söylediğimiz gibi daha ciddidir. Yani ciddi bir konu olduğu ya da ciddi bir konu olduğunu düşündüğünde ve dinlenmediğini fark ettiğinde trip atma yoluna başvururlar. Bu aslında çok fazla konuşmak istemediklerini gösterir ve böyle durumlarda çok üzerine gitmemek en doğrusudur. Böyle durumlarda konu ile ilgili tartışarak çözüm bulmak yerine, alttan alan bir tavırla yaklaşmanız onun sakinleşmesini sağlamak ve sizle iletişimini kesmemesi açısından en etkili yol olacaktır.
Eğer sizden dolayı kaynaklanan bir problemden dolayı erkek arkadaşınız trip atıyorsa özür diledikten sonra daha günlük ve başka bir konudan sohbet açmaya çalışabilirsiniz. Durum sandığımızdan daha ciddi ise o zaman söylediğimiz gibi, bir süre kendi haline bırakmak en doğrusu olacaktır.
İkili İlişkilerde Orta Yol Bulma Sorunsalı
Günümüzde yediklerimizden mi, soluduğumuz havadan mı bilinmez, insanlar birbirlerine daha az tahammül etmeye başladı. Bu da herhangi bir konuda tartışma ortamı oluştuğu zaman her iki kişinin de kendini haklı görmesine ve karşısındaki kişiyi konuşarak bastırmaya çalışmasına sebep olmaktadır. Bilhassa sevgililik ilişkilerinde kişilerin bu yaklaşımı, ilişkinin devam etmesini bile engelleyebiliyor. Böyle durumlarda aslında yapılacak her zaman tek şey vardır; sakin olmak.
Siz kendi söylediğinizin doğru, karşınızdaki ise kendi söylediğini doğru görecektir. Peki bunun sonu var mı? Aslında hayır. Bu yüzden her tartışma esnasında mümkün olduğunca soğukkanlı kalmanızı öneriyoruz. Hatta daha sakin ve dingin bir zamanınızda da arkadaşınızla bu konuyu konuşarak, tartışma esnasındaki tutumunuzu değiştirmeye başlayabilirsiniz. Unutmayın ki bir insan sinirliyken rahatlıkla düşündüğü her şeyi söyleyebilir ve bu kalp kırıcı da olabilmektedir. İlişkinize, karşınızdakine ve kendinize saygınız varsa, değer veriyor ve önemsiyorsanız, en azından tartışma esnasında daha yapıcı bir şekilde söylemek istediklerinizi söyleyerek konunun kavga boyutuna ulaşmasını engelleyebilirsiniz.
Tartıştıktan Sonra Günlerce Konuşmamak
Tartıştıktan sonra günlerce konuşmayı kesmek, ilişkilerin sağlığı açısından oldukça tehlikeli bir durumdur. Aynı zamanda da ilişkinin bitip bitmemesi gerektiği konusunda sinyal verir. Şöyle ki, karşınızdaki kişiye saygı duyuyorsanız, onunla birlikte olmak istiyorsanız, onu seviyorsanız ve onu düşünüyorsanız, günlerce konuşmamayı muhtemelen göze alamazsınız. Belki birkaç saat konuşmadan durabilirsiniz fakat sonrası bilhassa kafanızı meşgul edeceğiniz bir şey yapmıyorsanız oldukça zor geçecektir. Ama bir de tam tersini düşünün. İlişkiye karşı saygınız bittiyse, bunaldıysanız, karşınızdaki kişiyi özlemiyorsanız ve en önemlisi, onsuz da günlük yaşantınıza rahatlıkla devam edebiliyorsanız, uzun süre konuşmamanız da aslında sizin için zor olmayacaktır.
Yukarıda bahsettiklerimiz tamamen içgüdüsel olarak hareket ettiğimiz bir tavır. Eğer tartıştıktan sonra siz veya karşınızdaki kişi bu şekilde bir tavır sergiliyorsa, kendinizi ve karşınızdaki kişiyi daha fazla yıpratmadan, konuşarak ilişkiyi bitirmeniz daha doğru bir karar olacaktır. Hiçbir zaman kaybettiğiniz vaktinizin geri gelmeyeceğini düşünerek, kendinizi üzmeyin.
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